Tuesday, April 24, 2012

NA NA NA NA, NA NA NA NA, HEY HEY HEY GOODYE!

Sent out our dossier today and I will NOT miss seeing that pile of papers just staring me down every day! Thank God it is gone! Now we will hope and pray that everything is right and that nothing will need to be redone. We are still waiting on our finalized Home Study and our hope is that it will not take more than a couple weeks to have that in hand. I was almost giddy picking up that last letter we needed and taking that whole stack of our life on paper and mailing it out to our agency. My stomach was in knots with anxiety about it all but there is also a sense of relief that we are one step closer to our boys!

Friday, April 20, 2012

1 month until Haiti

In one month today we'll be in Haiti. We fly out May 18th with Mallery and Frentz and we'll finally be with both of our boys. This is incredibly bittersweet...because we know they will not be able to come home for a long time. It could be 12-18 months. Compiling our dossier has not gone as we planned and the timing is not what we expected. This has been the busiest season Kevin has ever experienced in his job, perhaps ever in a job. The travel volume has been much too high and has made it challenging to gather our documents in a timely manner. All frustrating...some of it within our control, some of it not. We are waiting on one final piece right now and our prayer is that that dossier, which has now become my nemesis, will be out of our hands and on to our agency before out trip. It will be translated and then head to Haiti. I cannot wait for that moment when we know it is there. There's a sense of security, however false it may be, in knowing our life on paper is in the hands of the people who will move our case along and get us closer to bringing our 2 precious boys home. The waiting now will be nothing compared to the waiting that is to come. I remember what that was like with Melat...knowing her name, her face, that she was ours but we still had to endure that waiting. I've been reading a book called Dangerous Wonder. It's about faith, childlike faith, and how as adults that pure faith and trust gets replaced by responsibility, business and the noise of this world. The author encourages us to embrace "play", to recapture it and begin to see the world through God's eyes. One thing the author ponders is the idea that God can be a playful God. We are made in His image after all. He talks about God hiding, then popping out unexpectantly in our lives....He hides even in the pain and suffering and shows up in ways we never imagined. It's not that He's not there, we just don't always see Him...not yet anyway. I now imagine God hiding in the "waiting", that time of difficulty we'll experience being separated from our 2 other children, and when the time is right we'll see Him, we'll be reminded how present He really is. Just love this pic of our sweet boy Caleb who turned 4 in February. Can't wait to meet him!